17 posts tagged “life”
He is curious, talks a lot and loves Spiderman. LOL
Last week, my girl too him to the Met Museum to see the superhero exhibit. She said this was the best $15 she has ever spent. (The cape and everything else that came with it, that is. LOL)
Anyway, my love for this picture. As he spreads his arms out...running down the roof of the Met, he has no cares in the world. He
This is where I am now and it has been a long time coming.
You meet people in life who either support you and help you get over or they "support" you and tear you down.
I realize that I have had a lot of the latter in my life. Friends who have been "supportive"...but they had their own self doubts that made them not be true.
That is okay, because that is what life is about...learning from the past and making things better in the future.
So...like M...I feel like Superwoman and know that I can and will do any and everything that I set my sights on. God is supporting me on ALL sides and anything is possible.
I haven't been here in a hot ass minute. I have got to do better by my blog. Things have been rolling along in my life ever so nicely, but there are other things that are urkin' me...and no place to get them out like your blog.
- Okay...those people who say that there is no racism in the workplace. lemme tell you something, there is. And I have a double whammy, i am not only brown, but I am a woman. A woman who is intelligent and has a handle on the English language. One who has a FOUR year degree from a highly regarded state university. Don't sniff out on me and think because I sit where I sit that ignorance is my thing. My parents spent an AWFUL amount of money to make me into the person I am today. Don't try me...cause in all honesty, I ain't your whipping boy.
- So, I let him back in. I don't usually let men back in after they have gone out. I just can't, but this one. OH MAH GAWD. I let him back in...slowly....on my own terms....on my level. Jesus wept. He is so fine, so articulate, so...chocolate....so....yummy. Okay, I must stop. But he is back...and he is MINES. LOL
- You know I am always amazed at the people who have to convince others that they are a person of positivity. In the words of Fire Marshall Bill...LEMMETELLYOUSOMETHING....when you are positive, it comes out of your pores and you don't have to tell anyone to make them believe it. It is just the way life is and functions.
- The mom is officially retired. LOL It is priceless, but also stressful. I am firm, when God blesses me with this hubby...I need more than one kid. Having all the responsiblities falling on one person is a DOG.
- I am a confirmed Facebook addict. LOL The best thing is I have connected with some REALLY dear friends. One is my friend from high school and another is someone who i have been friends with for TWENTY years. *sigh* Everytime we think of the years we gag. LOL It is so good to be connected again.
- Speaking of friends, I have been doing the washing away the friends right out of my hair again. You know friendship is an equal partnership like any relationship. If I feel that I am pulling you to hang, you don't have to worry, I won't bother you. BUT in return, don't act surprised when I comment on it. I can't stand that phony B.S. Be real...
- Oh another fact for the day....I can't stand liars and bullshit artist. (This is the Jack and Coke talking.)
- Speaking of Jack and Coke...today I went to one of our local Irish Pubs and gotta drink. Well, gotta couple of drinks. I needed it. When I left my office at lunch time I was in a tight place. Tight place where I would cuss yo' ass out. Yes...in ghetto terms. LOL The one thing I realized, drinking at lunch time truly a treat, but also a bad thing. I need a nap and I can't stop laughing like a maniac. LOL So...I guess they will now officially think I am a looney toon. Well...I am. *projectile laughter*
Alright, I have vented some and now....I am going to sit here and chill and read the paper or something...since I don't have ONE piece of music with me to work on. Where in the hayle was my damn head today???
Earlier this month, my church celebrated its 200th anniversary by performing a mass that Wyn.ton Mars.alis' wrote. The music was spectacular, the orchestra was phenomenal....and I was musically revived.
The even better part...I realized that just because someone says they are your friend, doesn't mean they really are. It most times is a rouse to get something that they want or need. That is cool too...and it is even cooler that I have to let you go. I support you....I feel that you should support me. Just common courtesy. But...I will say, I did ask for clarity and God granted it. LOL
So...as April comes to a close, I am so grateful....so blessed...so excited for what is to come.
- This is the best birthday week I have had in a long time...and the goodness has not stopped giving. Tomorrow I am going to see Frankie Beverly and Maze. *singing* Silky, Silky...souuuuuuuuuuuuul!
- Intimacy....we just have created more.
- I love me some Alpha Males. I could never understand a weak man...not talking about sensitive men...but weak men. I like focus, goal driven, God fearing, standing up for themselves under any situation...Alpha men.
- Having me locked and watching JayZ on VH1Soul....with him....
- Yes, I love Jack and Coke and that doesn't make me less of a lady. ROTFL
- My recital is 4 weeks and some days away...ACK!!!
- Every time I hear Whitney sing I Have Nothing....I still can't believe she cracked out her voice. I am still waiting on the comeback album. We need a real singer amongst some of these amateurs.
- Since I gave up soda's for lent, I haven't had the desire to drink another one. Praise God...and the weight loss journey continues.
- My eyeballs are super tired today.
- I wish Black Evil Television wasn't afraid of what Boondocks had to say. OMG....these episodes are PRICELESS.
- It is almost time for lunch. Thank you Jesus...I am hawngry.. Personally I could use a cocktail and a fried fish sammy. How cultured of me. *snickering*
- Chrisette Michele said it best....What's the feeling that I get, ever single time I look deep into your eyes....every time i hear your voice, It seems I have no choice but to be amazed, It is like music to my ears..... Bam...says it all. LMAO
- And...FINALLY.....I send birthday greetings to my fellow Aries', NY sistah who has moved to the ATL and birthday week partnah...DJ DIVA Thirty-five is going to be rockin' and amazing for both of us!
My mother just called me to see if I had checked my email. I told her yea I will. She said one of her students had passed this past January of meningitis. My mother is still stunned. Her former student was 27, working on her 2nd masters and a guidance counselor at a prep school here in Queens.
Her father sent this email to my mother and I share it with you. Teachers are important. It is the most under appreciated profession. Teachers spend the majority of time with your children. They are the ones who effectively teach them how to function in the world as productive adults. If there is one in your life who made a major impact...let them know.
Ms Pates,
I don't know if you remember them or not, but you taught my daughters,
Alison and LeeAnne, at Van Buren H. S. LeeAnne was also in the All City Chorus
under your direction. You played a very important role in both of their lives,
but especially so for LeeAnne.
I'm not sure if you've heard or not, but LeeAnne passed away suddenly on
January 25. She was in her fourth year working as a guidance counselor at St.
Francis Prep H. S. She thought she had a bad cold for a week or so. On Wed.,
Jan. 16 she stayed home from school, but she was back at work on Thurs. and Fri.
She was ill over the weekend, but she didn't feel poorly enough to go to the
doctor. On Sunday, the 20th, Kathy, (my wife) finally convinced LeeAnne to go
to a doctor. She went to a walk-in medical clinic and was diagnosed with the
flu and sent home. Several hours later, she collapsed into Kathy's arms and
stopped breathing. Kathy poked her and got her breathing intermittently. She
yelled for Lee's downstairs neighbors who called EMS and then called me to come
over. LeeAnne was taken to N. Shore Univ. Medical Center where she was
diagnosed with meningitis.
The prognosis was not good. She was placed on a respirator that Sun.
evening. She was unconscious and unresponsive. On Monday we were told that
things were touch and go and that, if she survived, we were in for a long haul.
By Tuesday, she was doing better and was actually taken off the respirator early
in the evening. She was conscious for a few minutes, but had to be sedated
because she was pulling at the other tubes and wires. The doctors and nurses
were dumbfounded by the recovery they were seeing. Wed. brought more good news.
She was up in a chair and eating. The medical staff called it a miracle. By
Thursday, she was pretty much her old self. She was joking and talking. She
was told that she would be coming home on Sunday. Everyone rejoiced. She asked
me to driver her to her graduate classes at St. John's if she wasn't feeling
100% by Tuesday night. She was working on her second Master's. The first was
in School Counseling. The second would have been in Administration and
Supervision.
At around 11:15 she called to say that she was out of the ICU and in a
regular room. She said, "Good night. I love you. I'll see you tomorrow." I
couldn't stop thanking the Lord for this miracle.
Shortly before 5 am on Friday morning, the phone rang. It was a doctor
calling to tell us to come to the hospital immediately. By the time we arrived,
it was all over. She died of massive blood clots. They're still not sure whyy.
Needless to say, we are all devastated by this. It is nearly 8 weeks, but
it still seems like a horrible dream and I just want to wake up. Each day seems
to be more difficult, and we don't know how we'll survive Easter.
We never realized the impact that LeeAnne had. There were over 1,200 people
who came to the wake and over 700 attended her funeral service. Friends from as
far back as pre-school came. Teachers from PS 18, MS 172, Van Buren H. S. and
professors from St. John's were there. Arlene Blum, Andrew Persoff, Ginny
Statleman, Loni Jacobson, and Marc Commanchero came to the wake. Ginny and Marc
both spoke at the funeral service, as did other friends, family and a number of
her students.
While preparing for the funeral, we looked through her apartment and
gathered pictures and important mementos for the funeral home. One thing that
we found was the letter that is attached to this e-mail. We don't know if
LeeAnne ever actually sent it to you or not. It is a letter that she wrote
shortly before her college graduation. We placed it in a frame and displayed it
along with 27 years of photos, several awards and her stuffed puppy that she
kept from childhood.
Your name came up often in our home, even thought it will be 10 years in
June since LeeAnne graduated from Van. I often spoke, gratefully, of, "The wit
and wisdom of Patricia Pates." You were the kind of teacher that every student
needs. You were the kind of teacher that LeeAnne emulated on a day to day
basis. You always encouraged the girls to be the best that they could possibly
be. You modeled your beliefs to them in class and out. I hope you realize the
influence that you have had on hundreds, maybe thousands of students. They are
better people because of their time with you.
LeeAnne remained friendly with Michael Cabon, who she met in All City. They
often talked about coming into the City on a Saturday morning and surprising
you. They had wonderful memories of those rehearsals and concerts. As so often
happens in life, they never made that trip. I hope that Michael comes to see
you, but it is too late for LeeAnne.
Kathy and I wanted to be sure that you saw this letter. We want to thank
you for all you gave to your students, and in particular, to LeeAnne. We are
so grateful that she had your influence in her life.
Here is LeeAnne's letter
Usually in the morning when I am talking to a couple of friends, I make them laugh with random statements. LOL I am just crazy that way. For example, I will say...I have a statement to make..."I am not speaking to Dimples cause he has made me mad." Bullsh*t...cause Dimples will call and then all will be better in that land. LOL
Antywho...last night at our Women's Day Revival our guest speaker, Rev. Ren.ita J.Wee.ms, spoke on the Queen of Sheba. Hoo boy...was she poppin'!! LOL
From the notes I took...here is my statement for the day. LOL
I am the Queen of Sheba because I walk with purpose. I am woman with parameters. I am prescient. I am a woman of prayer.
Happy Thursday!
This is the only way I could describe the feeling after my date...especially since he was teasing me about this song. *swoon*
Appetizer
What is your middle name? Would you change any of your names if you could? If so, what would you like to be called?
My middle name is Pa.tes. It is my mother's maiden name. The family name. The name that can only live via us chicks as middle names. I have one male cousin, who had one male son and we are praying he has some boys too. Until then....we all are stuck with it. When I was in my teens I wanted to change my first name. I am named after my mother, well sorta, and I didn't want to be. I know it just sounds absurd, but at 12, I didn't want to relate. It is just that ugly awful teen thing....you don't want to be like your parents. Then you grow. I have grown and I have a lot of my mother's qualities...and a lot of my dad. I can say now, I like my name. People say it is unique. It means of nobility. *shrug*
If I had to have another name, it would be Amanda, after my grandmother.
Soup
If you were a fashion designer, which fabrics, colors, and styles would you probably use the most?
I would use mostly silk..raw silk at that. I love the feel on my skin. I would use bright colors, red, orange, green, pink, yellow....colors that look beautiful on brown skin. Styles....things that are flatter to plus sizes. I hate that designers either think we look good in mu-mus or stuff that people who wear size 4 should wear. We have every right to look sexy as the next person.
Salad
What is your least favorite chore, and why?
DISH WASHING.
Main Course
What is something that really frightens you, and can you trace it back to an event in your life?
Hmmmm... Life frightens me. In more ways than none. You just never know what to expect the next day. Event in my life...uhh, no. LOL
Dessert
Where are you sitting right now? Name 3 things you can see at this moment.
I am sitting in my living room on my couch...watching grey's anatomy on the tv, looking at my pretty Christmas tree dreading to take it down this saturday, and looking at my chunky cat who needs to join her owner on a food lifestyle change.
I got this fire
Sweet and true
But I'm cold as ice around youCause I'm lonely
Whenever you're around
Cause I'm lonely
Whenever you're around - Jill Scott Whenever You're Around
Lately I have been reentering the dating scene. *sigh* Jill said it right, sometimes i am just lonely whenever you're around. That is the way I have felt on a lot of dates. Like this painful toenail pulling experience. Just odd and totally uncomfortable. Blah.
Antywhoo, this past Saturday, I finally had a great date. I mean a REALLY GREAT date and all we did was just hang and talk and walk around after lunch. The guy who I went out with has been trying to get me to hang with him for about 3 years. I just never gave him the time of day and now I realize that is so stupid on my part.
What was the hold up? Me being totally shallow...he is short. Yea, that was my excuse. *smacking my own hand*. LOL How short you ask? Well, when I wear my Ni.ke Sh.ox he is looking me square in my eye. (I am 5'4.5" flat footed...so with shox about 5'6".) ROTFL Seriously.
Antywho, with him staring me in the eye...I had a wonderful time. LOL Well, lemme recap on somethings that made it wonderful.
- He made me feel like a lady. There was no showiness, but just all man. Alpha Man!! LOL
- He held doors open and made sure that no one would get through it before me.
- He walked on the right side of the street. (Meaning he walked on the curb side.)
- When we talked I could tell he was listening to what I had to say. Not pseudo listening and thinking up the next question he wanted to ask.
- He introduced me to some CD's that I need to go out and buy.
- He went to Carol's Daughter with me...AND DIDN'T GRIPE, COMPLAIN OR TALK BAD ABOUT THE STORE. (This earned him about 55 points! LOL)
- He asked me if I wanted to go with him in the sneaker store...and I did. He even explained some things to me and didn't seem frustrated doing that.
- He kept me laughing.
- He has a great personality. THERE WAS NEVER A PAINFUL SILENT MOMENT.
- He paid me a compliment.
- He walked me to my door.
- Gave me the sweetest goodnight kiss.
I swear....he was a gem and I am glad I FINALLY took him up on his offer. Sometimes good things are in small football built packages. ROTFLMAO
I told her and she just shook her head. I said to her, "To quote my mother, there was a conversation that should have been held and obviously was not."
That is my mother's favorite quote when she hears things that she thinks is a calamity. "There is a conversation that needs to be held."
I laugh at it, but there was a conversation that was held in my house between me and my mother. My mother is a high school teacher and she has never made any bones discussing sex with me, even when I thought it was the grossest conversation to have.
In retrospect, I am glad it is a conversation that we did have.
At 14, when my mother felt the friends that I had were TOO fast, she and I went on one of our drives and we talked. We talked about a lot of things, but her bottom line was this..."You will want to have sex, it is natural, but there are few things you need to know. First, sex is the strongest drive a human can have. Second, if you have sex, please protect yourself from diseases and an unwanted pregnancy. And last, just know this, if you get pregnant there are a couple of things that can happen. If you do, your father and I will set you up on your own. If you are grown enough to have a baby, you are grown enough to do this ish on your own. Also, know that your father would be absolutely devastated and heart broken."
My mother never really had to say much more about me, sex or having babies. She brought condoms home, but I never took them because I didn't want her to know when and if things were going on. The thing that kept me in check was the fact that my mother said my father would be devastated and heart broken. THAT was one thing I could never wrap my mind around...embarrassing my father.
I say all of this to say, I just wanna know what happened with Ly.nne Spears and her household and why there wasn't a conversation being held. It is obvious by Brit.ney's behavior and now this turn of events...nothing was happening.