17 posts tagged “life”

I haven't been here in a hot ass minute.  I have got to do better by my blog.  Things have been rolling along in my life ever so nicely, but there are other things that are urkin' me...and no place to get them out like your blog.

• Okay...those people who say that there is no racism in the workplace. lemme tell you something, there is.  And I have a double whammy, i am not only brown, but I am a woman.  A woman who is intelligent and has a handle on the English language.  One who has a  FOUR year degree from a highly regarded state university.  Don't sniff out on me and think because I sit where I sit that ignorance is my thing.  My parents spent an AWFUL amount of money to make me into the person I am today.  Don't try me...cause in all honesty, I ain't your whipping boy.
• So, I let him back in.  I don't usually let men back in after they have gone out.  I just can't, but this one.  OH MAH GAWD.  I let him back in...slowly....on my own terms....on my level.  Jesus wept.  He is so fine, so articulate, so...chocolate....so....yummy.  Okay, I must stop.  But he is back...and he is MINES. LOL
• You know I am always amazed at the people who have to convince others that they are a person of positivity.  In the words of Fire Marshall Bill...LEMMETELLYOUSOMETHING....when you are positive, it comes out of your pores and you don't have to tell anyone to make them believe it. It is just the way life is and functions.
• The mom is officially retired.  LOL It is priceless, but also stressful.  I am firm, when God blesses me with this hubby...I need more than one kid.  Having all the responsiblities falling on one person is a DOG.
• I am a confirmed Facebook addict.  LOL The best thing is I have connected with some REALLY dear friends.  One is my friend from high school and another is someone who i have been friends with for TWENTY years. *sigh*  Everytime we think of the years we gag. LOL  It is so good to be connected again.
• Speaking of friends, I have been doing the washing away the friends right out of my hair again.  You know friendship is an equal partnership like any relationship.  If I feel that I am pulling you to hang, you don't have to worry, I won't bother you.  BUT in return, don't act surprised when I comment on it.  I can't stand that phony B.S. Be real...
• Oh another fact for the day....I can't stand liars and bullshit artist.  (This is the Jack and Coke talking.)
• Speaking of Jack and Coke...today I went to one of our local Irish Pubs and gotta drink.  Well, gotta couple of drinks.  I needed it.  When I left my office at lunch time I was in a tight place.  Tight place where I would cuss yo' ass out.  Yes...in ghetto terms. LOL  The one thing I realized, drinking at lunch time truly a treat, but also a bad thing.  I need a nap and I can't stop laughing like a maniac.  LOL  So...I guess they will now officially think I am a looney toon. Well...I am. *projectile laughter*

Alright, I have vented some and now....I am going to sit here and chill and read the paper or something...since I don't have ONE piece of music with me to work on.  Where in the hayle was my damn head today???

My mother just called me to see if I had checked my email.  I told her yea I will.  She said one of her students had passed this past January of meningitis.  My mother is still stunned.  Her former student was 27, working on her 2nd masters and a guidance counselor at a prep school here in Queens.

Her father sent this email to my mother and I share it with you.  Teachers are important.  It is the most under appreciated profession.  Teachers spend the majority of time with your children.  They are the ones who effectively teach them how to function in the world as productive adults.  If there is one in your life who made a major impact...let them know.

Ms Pates,
    I don't know if you remember them or not, but you taught my daughters, 
Alison and LeeAnne, at Van Buren H. S.  LeeAnne was also in the All City Chorus 
under your direction.  You played a very important role in both of their lives, 
but especially so for LeeAnne.

    I'm not sure if you've heard or not, but LeeAnne passed away suddenly on 
January 25.  She was in her fourth year working as a guidance counselor at St. 
Francis Prep H. S. She thought she had a bad cold for a week or so.  On Wed., 
Jan. 16 she stayed home from school, but she was back at work on Thurs. and Fri.  
She was ill over the weekend, but she didn't feel poorly enough to go to the 
doctor.  On Sunday, the 20th, Kathy, (my wife) finally convinced LeeAnne to go 
to a doctor.  She went to a walk-in medical clinic and was diagnosed with the 
flu and sent home.  Several hours later, she collapsed into Kathy's arms and 
stopped breathing.  Kathy poked her and got her breathing intermittently.  She 
yelled for Lee's downstairs neighbors who called EMS and then called me to come 
over.  LeeAnne was taken to N. Shore Univ. Medical Center where she was 
diagnosed with meningitis.

    The prognosis was not good.  She was placed on a respirator that Sun. 
evening.  She was unconscious and unresponsive.  On Monday we were told that 
things were touch and go and that, if she survived, we were in for a long haul.  
By Tuesday, she was doing better and was actually taken off the respirator early 
in the evening.  She was conscious for a few minutes, but had to be sedated 
because she was pulling at the other tubes and wires.  The doctors and nurses 
were dumbfounded by the recovery they were seeing.  Wed. brought more good news.  
She was up in a chair and eating.  The medical staff called it a miracle.  By 
Thursday, she was pretty much her old self.  She was joking and talking.  She 
was told that she would be coming home on Sunday.  Everyone rejoiced.  She asked 
me to driver her to her graduate classes at St. John's if she wasn't feeling 
100% by Tuesday night.  She was working on her second Master's.  The first was 
in School Counseling.  The second would have been in Administration and 
Supervision.

    At around 11:15 she called to say that she was out of the ICU and in a 
regular room.  She said, "Good night.  I love you.  I'll see you tomorrow."  I 
couldn't stop thanking the Lord for this miracle.

    Shortly before 5 am on Friday morning, the phone rang.  It was a doctor 
calling to tell us to come to the hospital immediately.  By the time we arrived, 
it was all over.  She died of massive blood clots.  They're still not sure whyy.
   
	Needless to say, we are all devastated by this.  It is nearly 8 weeks, but 
it still seems like a horrible dream and I just want to wake up.  Each day seems 
to be more difficult, and we don't know how we'll survive Easter.
    
	We never realized the impact that LeeAnne had.  There were over 1,200 people 
who came to the wake and over 700 attended her funeral service.  Friends from as 
far back as pre-school came.  Teachers from PS 18, MS 172, Van Buren H. S. and 
professors from St. John's were there.  Arlene Blum, Andrew Persoff, Ginny 
Statleman, Loni Jacobson, and Marc Commanchero came to the wake.  Ginny and Marc 
both spoke at the funeral service, as did other friends, family and a number of 
her students.

    While preparing for the funeral, we looked through her apartment and 
gathered pictures and important mementos for the funeral home.  One thing that 
we found was the letter that is attached to this e-mail.  We don't know if 
LeeAnne ever actually sent it to you or not.  It is a letter that she wrote 
shortly before her college graduation.  We placed it in a frame and displayed it 
along with 27 years of photos, several awards and her stuffed puppy that she 
kept from childhood.

    Your name came up often in our home, even thought it will be 10 years in 
June since LeeAnne graduated from Van.  I often spoke, gratefully, of, "The wit 
and wisdom of Patricia Pates."  You were the kind of teacher that every student 
needs.  You were the kind of teacher that LeeAnne emulated on a day to day 
basis.  You always encouraged the girls to be the best that they could possibly 
be.  You modeled your beliefs to them in class and out.  I hope you realize the 
influence that you have had on hundreds, maybe thousands of students.  They are 
better people because of their time with you.

    LeeAnne remained friendly with Michael Cabon, who she met in All City.  They 
often talked about coming into the City on a Saturday morning and surprising 
you.  They had wonderful memories of those rehearsals and concerts.  As so often 
happens in life, they never made that trip.  I hope that Michael comes to see 
you, but it is too late for LeeAnne.

    Kathy and I wanted to be sure that you saw this letter.  We want to thank 
you for all you gave to  your students, and in particular, to LeeAnne.  We are 
so grateful that she had your influence in her life.



Here is LeeAnne's letter


    
    
    

Leeannesletter

Usually in the morning when I am talking to a couple of friends, I make them laugh with random statements. LOL  I am just crazy that way.  For example, I will say...I have a statement to make..."I am not speaking to Dimples cause he has made me mad."  Bullsh*t...cause Dimples will call and then all will be better in that land. LOL

Antywho...last night at our Women's Day Revival our guest speaker, Rev. Ren.ita J.Wee.ms, spoke on the Queen of Sheba.  Hoo boy...was she poppin'!! LOL 

From the notes I took...here is my statement for the day. LOL

I am the Queen of Sheba because I walk with purpose. I am woman with parameters.  I am prescient.  I am a woman of prayer.

Happy Thursday!

This is the only way I could describe the feeling after my date...especially since he was teasing me about this song.  *swoon*

Rob Base & DJ EZ Rock - It Takes Two

MC Rob Base & DJ E-Z Rock

1 comment

Appetizer
What is your middle name? Would you change any of your names if you could? If so, what would you like to be called?

My middle name is Pa.tes.  It is my mother's maiden name.  The family name.  The name that can only live via us chicks as middle names.  I have one male cousin, who had one male son and we are praying he has some boys too.  Until then....we all are stuck with it.  When I was in my teens I wanted to change my first name.  I am named after my mother, well sorta, and I didn't want to be.  I know it just sounds absurd, but at 12, I didn't want to relate.  It is just that ugly awful teen thing....you don't want to be like your parents.  Then you grow.  I have grown and I have a lot of my mother's qualities...and a lot of my dad. I can say now, I like my name.  People say it is unique.  It means of nobility. *shrug*

If I had to have another name, it would be Amanda, after my grandmother.

Soup
If you were a fashion designer, which fabrics, colors, and styles would you probably use the most?

I would use mostly silk..raw silk at that.  I love the feel on my skin.  I would use bright colors, red, orange, green, pink, yellow....colors that look beautiful on brown skin.  Styles....things that are flatter to plus sizes.  I hate that designers either think we look good in mu-mus or stuff that people who wear size 4 should wear.  We have every right to look sexy as the next person.

Salad
What is your least favorite chore, and why?

DISH WASHING.

Main Course
What is something that really frightens you, and can you trace it back to an event in your life?

Hmmmm...  Life frightens me.  In more ways than none.  You just never know what to expect the next day.  Event in my life...uhh, no. LOL 

Dessert
Where are you sitting right now? Name 3 things you can see at this moment.

I am sitting in my living room on my couch...watching grey's anatomy on the tv, looking at my pretty Christmas tree dreading to take it down this saturday, and looking at my chunky cat who needs to join her owner on a food lifestyle change.

I got this fire
Sweet and true
But I'm cold as ice around you

Cause I'm lonely
Whenever you're around
Cause I'm lonely
Whenever you're around - Jill Scott Whenever You're Around

Lately I have been reentering the dating scene. *sigh*  Jill said it right, sometimes i am just lonely whenever you're around.  That is the way I have felt on a lot of dates.  Like this painful toenail pulling experience.  Just odd and totally uncomfortable.  Blah.

Antywhoo, this past Saturday, I finally had a great date.  I mean a REALLY GREAT date and all we did was just hang and talk and walk around after lunch.  The guy who I went out with has been trying to get me to hang with him for about 3 years.  I just never gave him the time of day and now I realize that is so stupid on my part. 

What was the hold up?  Me being totally shallow...he is short.  Yea, that was my excuse. *smacking my own hand*.  LOL  How short you ask?  Well, when I wear my Ni.ke Sh.ox he is looking me square in my eye. (I am 5'4.5" flat footed...so with shox about 5'6".) ROTFL  Seriously.

Antywho, with him staring me in the eye...I had a wonderful time. LOL Well, lemme recap on somethings that made it wonderful.

1. He made me feel like a lady.  There was no showiness, but just all man.  Alpha Man!! LOL
2. He held doors open and made sure that no one would get through it before me.
3. He walked on the right side of the street. (Meaning he walked on the curb side.)
4. When we talked I could tell he was listening to what I had to say.  Not pseudo listening and thinking up the next question he wanted to ask.
5. He introduced me to some CD's that I need to go out and buy.
6. He went to Carol's Daughter with me...AND DIDN'T GRIPE, COMPLAIN OR TALK BAD ABOUT THE STORE. (This earned him about 55 points! LOL)
7. He asked me if I wanted to go with him in the sneaker store...and I did.  He even explained some things to me and didn't seem frustrated doing that.
   
8. He kept me laughing.
9. He has a great personality. THERE WAS NEVER A PAINFUL SILENT MOMENT.
10. He paid me a compliment.
11. He walked me to my door.
12. Gave me the sweetest goodnight kiss.

I swear....he was a gem and I am glad I FINALLY took him up on his offer.  Sometimes good things are in small football built packages. ROTFLMAO